Jay Thorntree is one of the agents from the Original Series. She most famously worked with Acacia Byrd in the Department of Mary Sues and the Department of Implausible Crossovers. When Acacia retired, she worked with Agent Rhus.
- Warning: contains spoilers for The Reorganisation.
Jay was recruited to the PPC in 1996 HST, and immediately joined the Department of Mary Sues. The identities of her partners in those early days are not known; however, at least one is said to have been killed by Nendil Morifëa of the Department of Internal Security, and one (possibly the same one) is rumored to have gone insane.
Jay was involved in the later events of the Reorganisation, specifically the attacks on the DIS which drove them from HQ. She is credited with the idea (specifically, deflecting the rays with mirrors) which defeated the Daleks—the DIS's secret weapon, which nearly won them the war—and is known to have worked alongside Jared Calinson and Mortic Wentway for the duration of the crisis. She also defeated Nendil in a duel during these events, but was unable to kill him.
In 2002, Jay was partnered with a new assassin: Acacia Byrd. The pair became the most famous assassins in the PPC, with the largest body of mission reports available at the time. They worked together for less than a year—including a stint in the Department of Implausible Crossovers—before Acacia retired for sanity reasons. During this time, the pair ended the PPC's kill-all-Cute Animal Friends policy when they recruited Alice.
Jay remained in the DMS following her partner's retirement, and was assigned to Rhus Radicans. However, they completed only two (recorded) missions before Jay, too, retired in 2003.
- 1996 - Recruited to the PPC and the DMS.
- 1997-1998 - Partner killed by Nendil Morifëa.
- 1999 - The Reorganisation. Jay helps send the DIS into exile.
- 2002 - Partnered with Acacia Byrd.
- 2003 - Acacia Byrd retires. Jay retires soon after, following a brief partnership with Rhus.
- The mission logs of Jay and Acacia can be found at Miss Cam's website
- Archived at PPC: The Lost Tales (incomplete)
- Via the Wayback Machine (the only way to find "The Dark Elf")
Partnered with Acacia
- Chapter 1: "Rambling Band" (Lord of the Rings)
- Meet the Assassins as they rid Middle-earth of stray punk rockers in Rivendell.
- Sue: Laurel
- Chapter 3: "Lady of the Fellowship" (Lord of the Rings)
- Technical difficulties are experienced, and necessity proves the mother of invention as the Asssassins encounter a Warrior-'Sue.
- Sue: Akasha
- Chapter 4: "Protector of the Ringbearer" (Lord of the Rings), with Luxury
- Chapter 5: "What Might Have Been" (Lord of the Rings)
- Chapter 6: "And in the Darkness Bind Them" (Lord of the Rings)
- Zelda meets Dragonlance meets the Assassins: PPC 1, "Link" 0.
- Sue: Link
- Chapter 7: "Children of the Earth" (Lord of the Rings), with Agents Luxury and Sean (DBS)
- Chapter 8: "Why am I Here" (Lord of the Rings)
- Chapter 9: "Laugh at the Moon" (Lord of the Rings)
- Scientific "Testing to Destruction" of a Mary Sue.
- Sue: Alexis
- Chapter 10: "Vacation at OFUM"
- (Which turns out to be a Working Vacation, of course...)
- A visit to OFUM
- Chapter 11: "Mithril" (Lord of the Rings)
- Elrond's other daughter meets a timely end in Generic FantasyLand.
- Sue: Mithril Starlight
- Chapter 12: "Gwendolyn" (Lord of the Rings)
- In which it is seen that ten is not a logical number.
- Sue: Gwendolyn Elizabeth Huntington
- Chapter 13: "All Souls Night" (Lord of the Rings)
- What to do with flames, and no-win situations.
- Sue: Ariuella Shadowfox
- Chapter 14: "Sisterhood" (Lord of the Rings)
- Chapter 16: "We Cannot Be" (Lord of the Rings)
- Andromielle Zinnia, 'Sue Social Status, and OOCness... (Plus! Limited time offer: see Jay sane.)
- Sue: Andromielle Zinnia
- Chapter 17: "Darkness Awakened" (Lord of the Rings x Star Wars)
- Chapter 18: "Two Worlds" (Lord of the Rings x Harry Potter)
- The prodigal daughter of Remus Lupin and Galadriel gets what's coming to her.
- Sue: Serenity
- Chapter 19: "Torment" (Lord of the Rings), Jay with Agent Dead (DE)
- "You don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps."—Especially when dealing with a case where the canon characters are totally out of their minds. Oh, the pain...
- Bad Slash
- Chapter 20: "The Luggage Runs Off With the One Ring" (Lord of the Rings x Discworld)
- Discworld crossover mayhem—say goodby to sanity...
- Implausible Crossover
- Chapter 22: "Elemental Crystals" (Lord of the Rings)
- Chapter 23: "To Know Where You Are Going" (Lord of the Rings)
- Elrond and Arwen: the love story never told. For a bloody good reason, as Jay and Acacia... explain to the Possesion-Sue.
- Sue: Sue!Arwen
- Chapter 24: "A Taste of Blood" (Lord of the Rings), Jay with Agent Dee (RPFD)
Partnered with Rhus
- Chapter 25: "Broken Doll" (Lord of the Rings)
- Chapter 26: "No Way Back" (Lord of the Rings)
- The sad story of Candie the sk8er girl and her demise.
- Sue: Candace Van Allen
- The Reorganisation
- 1999. Jay is peripherally involved in the battles that take place in HQ, and duels Nendil Morifëa.
- "The Dark of the Moon" (Lord of the Rings), Agents Rosie Cotton Bomull and Nenya Gabriel (DMS - DMO)
- "A Will of Their Own" (Lord of the Rings), Agents Aerilyn and Zera (DMS - LotR)
- Jay and Acacia are kidnapped by a Mary Sue for the Sue's nefarious ends.
- "The Daughter of Jay and Acacia"
- ca. 2005, the first Jaycacia Thornbyrd story features an appearance by in-character Jay and Acacia.
- "Funeral for an Angil"
- Early 2006, the second Jaycacia story is read by Jay and Acacia in Jay's house.
- "All Roads"
- "A Sunflower's Tears"
- 2007 (chapters 1-3) and 2008 (chapters 4-6). The third Jaycacia story, read by Jay and Acacia in Jay's house.
- "Sweat, Blood and Tears"
- 2009. The fourth Jaycacia story. Jay visits Acacia in Rome to read it.
- "50 Shades of Canon"
- March 2012. Jay pays Acacia a visit when the PPC tries to bring them back. They don't come.